COVID-19: What we know about changes in California rules

Just a few minutes ago I happened on the post from a user who was speaking of a road trip that they've been taking for the last 6 months. I was reading their post and sort of taken aback by their description of things as they saw them.
Since July 25th or so of last year my partner, our two, (initially three)cats, and our few belongings have travelled over 15,000 miles through the western United States.
The trip has been made in two stints, the first of about 11,000 miles in a 9 ft moving van from a moving company.
The second leg is ongoing and is at around the 5,500 mile mark. For this leg we are in a 12 ft moving truck.
Contrary to the post which I read earlier the western United States seems to be doing fairly well.
I did not experience any great buildup of trash or see any massive piles of things that weren't going to make it to landfill. There were certainly a couple of places that talked about difficulties with the trash, but there was nothing standing in the open.
In northern California on the coast, the recycling plant has recently shut down. The local cities have managed to deal with their problem and there is nothing standing in the streets.
We traveled through wyoming, idaho, utah, Oregon, California extensively, arizona, new mexico, texas, oklahoma, Kansas, and colorado.
The biggest shock was that there was literally no visible impact from the covid pandemic. Of the many hospitals that I've seen in the last 6 months none of them look like they were in any dire way, beleaguered and short on supplies or anything like that. I certainly didn't need to seek any medical attention, but there didn't seem to be any strain on the system.
In fact in many cities it seems like folks just wear the mask and don't talk much about things.
My partner and I consider ourselves covid refugees as our living situation was upended due to the pandemic and it's consequences, and it appears that many such people are out on the road right now. It's no wonder that van living has been trendy for a minute, as many of us have been reduced to some form of that.
The Walmart parking lots throughout the United states, at least those states that I mentioned here in the west, all have a group of people sleeping in their automobiles in the parking lot every single night. That was a little intense.
Interestingly enough, we have learned that Walmart allows people to stay in their parking lots. Specifically in colorado we have been informed from a number of law enforcement officers that folks are literally allowed to stay at walmart, not just sleep there for an evening. My partner and I have personally seen individuals in recreational vehicle setups who have camped at certain Walmarts for weeks at a time.
To be clear, if you were to park your automobile, like a regular street car, at the Walmart parking lot and just leave it would be towed within a number of days. But if you are living in your vehicle and on that same parking lot they will likely only ask you to move. Your experience may vary, contact your local law enforcement for information.
On top of that, rather than seeing any massive lines for food banks or food pantries, or even soup kitchens, my partner and I have had easy and ready access to these services in every city and town that we've gone to. We have survived on the kindness and good will of people who have given their hearts and their time to come together and give.
There is no way we would have made it without the compassion of strangers. That's part of why I wanted to make this post, so that folks understand that though the system may collapse our humanity won't.
People all over the western United States are coming together to make sure we are all taken care of. We definitely saw our share of grunge, and our share of strife. There are a lot of homeless people on the streets, that is true. The worst that we've seen was in the Central Valley of California specifically in the Modesto Merced San Joaquin Valley area, as well as northern California and eureka and Arcata california. These places have a lot of very mentally unstable homeless folks running around.
Having said that, my partner, our cats, and I have been safe the entire time we've been on the road and never at any time have we specifically feared that someone was going to attack us or do us harm.
There is a special caveat to that in that I have massive size privilege. I'm 6 ft 4, and when coupled with the many facial scars I have and my general disregard for bullshit, I manage to avoid a lot of trouble. So again, your results as a U-Haul living covid-refugee may vary.
In general, anyone living in their vehicle sort of huddles together in the parking lots. It was a regular occurrence to go to sleep in an empty parking lot, and wake up with a cluster of people living in their vehicles around my own.
Another thing I'd like to speak about is that tension between citizens and the police seems to be at a minimal level right now. That seems completely counterintuitive to what I saw on the television before I left, and it's probably the same thing that most of you are thinking if you read this. But I have seen groups of homeless people and police officers dealing peacefully and trying to make the best of this situation the entire time I've been on the street.
I have yet to find a pocket of folks who were espousing extreme viewpoints in a public place. There are no more people with large signs signaling the end times on corners than ever before, there are no angry mobs of racists vowing to clash, there are no angry people looking for equal rights and burning things.
There are a lot of hungry, confused, intimidated individuals who are just trying to get by. A lot of families who are struggling to make ends meet and wondering what the heck is going to happen with all this.
But there is not despair, there is not a breakdown, and there is not a lack of humanity or kindness. We are all in this together whether in the United States or any other place in the world. It's good for us to remember that humanity is driven to cooperate as a means for success for our species.
The system that is ruling us is about to fall. All of us rats are about to chew through the walls of the ivory tower, and that's for the better.
But the Earth isn't going anywhere, and things might get really weird before it's all said and done, but we're not going anywhere either.
Remember to pet your dog or your cat, give your partner a hug if you have one, don't fret if you don't have one and love yourself because you need to be your own best friend anyway.
If you're frequently on Reddit go search with the random subreddit function and find some good communities. There's lots of people who are talking right now and we all have time to be on our computers so there's plenty of places to find good interactions.
I love this subreddit and I check it everyday, and it's a great way for me to figure out what's going on at large in the world. I agree completely that s*** is about to hit the fan in a major major way, and I can't say I'm not interested in seeing how that all plays out. But I worry that folks confuse the system crumbling with humanity crumbling. The system in place, and the structure of Whatever we've had that is physical society is probably going to change in rapid and dynamic ways, but humanity is going to stick together. Don't let anybody try to tell you otherwise.
Blessings to you and your family.

A hardwood refinishing story told in three photos

The three photos: https://imgur.com/a/vV7nclT
I had a thread on here the other day around trying to confirm if I was being lied to by my contractor. Long story short, I was. I fired the original contractor and hired a new one who did an amazing job at rescuing my floors. I'll keep the story to the end and put the tips/advice I learned from my experience first.
Some things to consider when hiring a refinishing contractor for your floors:

Always ask the contractor if the crew working are his own or if he is sub-contracting out the work to another crew. If he is having difficulty scheduling his own crew, then take it as a warning sign they might not normally work for him.
Always get the name of the products being used included in the contract. (edit: and almost as important, look up the datasheets for the products and learn about their preferred application methods, dry times, and cure times).
Always have the complete work scope included in the contract (ie: sanding, filling, staining, buffing, and especially # of coats of finish).
When sampling stain, the crew should be using named products straight from the can (like duraseal). Unless you are going super dark, avoid water-based stains. Oil-based stains like duraseal are relatively low VOC and tend to be standard. Avoid a custom stain mixture or color combo as it will prevent you from being able to reasonably match the look of the hardwood if you ever need to repair a smaller area in the future. If you go with a pre-mixed stain, then you know the type of color you need for any repair work in the future.
For a good looking finished floor, the work scope should go something like: Day 1: major sanding work + clean up + stain samples, Day 2: finish sanding work + clean up + staining + if enough time is left after a long break, maybe 1st coat of water-based poly. Day 3: Buffing + clean up + last 2 coats of water-based poly. This will differ based on size of the project, so take just as general guidance on the steps.
Except for really large jobs, stain should be wiped on by hand with rag, then almost immediately wiped off by hand with a clean rag. Finish varnish is applied with a applicator mop, but a good stain job should be done by hand.
Be wary of offers for oil-based sealers. In my region, oil-based sealers and finishes over 275 VOC are not legal. Stains like Duraseal are oil-based, but within legal limits and allowed. The sealers typically are not. I was very specific on my want to have water-based finish products only for the finish due to the fact that my pregnant wife and I were still residing at the property. Contractor #1 installed a oil-based sealer without asking me if I wanted it, then lied to me about it, which is part of the reason why I fired him. Contractor #2 was aware of that fact and my strict want for water-based finish only. Yet Contractor #2's work crew still asked me if I wanted an oil-based sealer to better protect the stain. The worker said it would protect the stain work for significantly longer and make it look really good. I asked if it was legal in California for wood floor application and the worker admitted it was not, so I told them to pass and only do the work as described in the contract for 3 coats of water-based Bona Mega finish. They accepted, but a few hours later asked me to please not mentioned their offer for the oil-based sealer to their boss (the contractor) cuz he "doesn't like when we do that sort of stuff". These workers were good guys who did fantastic work, so I didn't hold it against them. It just seems that the oil-based sealer is a bit of a standard under the table practice to make the work last longer vs. with water-based products.
Double check deposit limits in your state for licensed contractors. I've hired a number of contractors in the past, but never thought to question the varying deposits asked by them. For this project, contractor #1 asked me for a 50% deposit. Contractor #2 asked for nothing and told me it was because he could only ask for 10% max for a deposit per the state and the value was minimal, so he took the chance. I lucked out with the first contractor because he had a 50% deposit check in hand, but accidentally washed the check in his jeans and destroyed it. I put a stop order on the check for good measure the minute I fired the contractor, so no money lost, but it was pure luck he hadn't cashed it yet.
If you've got finish work (like painting walls), maybe save it for after the floor is refinished. While you may be extra careful not to damage anything if doing the work yourself, a contractor won't. Accidents will happen. And if you don't want to live with small damage or marks on walls after, you're going to have to paint it again anyways. Sometimes it's best to wait for the floors to be finished before doing finish paint work. Just cover the floors to avoid spillage when painting.

To those looking for more detail, here's a description for the three photos of my hardwood floor refinishing adventure:
Photo 1 - starting point: The old floors were full of scratches, deep wear marks, and flaking/missing varnish. The floors are original white oak from the 1940's. I'm not sure if they were ever refinished. I'd planned to refinish them myself with the help of youtube, but timing issues and my wife's persuading led me to go with a contractor. I followed the good old 3 quotes rule, though with a bit of a change due to COVID. I got most of the initial quoting details virtually via phone calls with the contractors I picked. I then chose the company I thought would be the best fit for my need and had that contractor come out for an in-person inspection and formal quote. If anything seemed off, I would move on to my next choice. The meeting with contractor #1 went well and I went with them. They were mid-priced with a large online presence with positive reviews. I figured, no way the floors can look any worse than they are now...
oh boy...
Photo 2 - The journey begins: I should have seen the warning signs right away. For sake of brevity, I'll just summarize the issues, but if people want a play by play, I will gladly share the 3 day saga. In summary, the contractor repeatedly lied about work scope done and repeatedly lied about the products that were used. He did this even when I questioned him on it at several points in the process, with him insisting that work was done when it had not been. When I finally got the chance to look at the work, it was extremely poor quality with multiple issues (stain not taking, poor sanding work, heavy damage to some of my walls, floor stain color extremely dark and nothing close to the sample done). The photo I took for this stage of the process was claimed to be almost finished work. According to the contractor, his guys just had to put 1 more coat of finish on it and they were done. Truth was, they'd only put down the stain and 1 high VOC oil-based sealer. No finish coats at all. No buffing. Nothing. The contractor's claims began to fall apart only after I got the specific product names he claimed he was using and I started showing him how the work he claimed was done couldn't possibly have been done in the timeline claimed, per the product manufacturer's own instructions. The contractor never apologized or admitted fault, but he did say he would talk with his workers and offered to fix the work to my satisfaction, to which I told him I was done using him. It boiled down to the fact that either his workers were lying to him on work done or he was knowingly lying to me about the work done. Either way, there was no way I could trust the work to be completed correctly as originally quoted. He agreed to walk away and leave it at that.
Photo 3 - Floor Refinishing Redux: After that, I scrambled to find a replacement contractor. I went to what was originally my second pick and the guy came out next day to look at the damage done. He agreed that the work was poorly done, and couldn't promise he could fix it, but that he'd be willing to try. I got a formal contract and his workers were out two days later to start the work. The process with contractor #2 vs. #1 was night and day. Contractor #2 understood the difficulties I had with the prior contractor and offered me complete transparency. He laid out a very strict timeline for workscope and insisted I come through regularly each day to check on the work being done. His guys spent 1 whole day just sanding and applying filler. They then showed me swatches of stains I could pick and applied multiple stain samples from pre-mixed duraseal quickset cans to sections of the sanded floor, so I could review them overnight and the next morning. They even left the stain cans next to the samples, so I could see what was being used. Day 2 was more sanding work plus application of the chosen stain. Then long lunch break with a ton of fans blowing air through the space followed by vacuuming/cleanup and first application of the water-based finish. I was apprehensive around that step since it seemed kind of rushed from stain coat to finish coat, but it turned out great. Day 3 was a full-scale buffing, followed by clean up, finish coat 1, long lunch, and then finish coat 2. The photo shared here is the finished product, though the floor looked similar in general quality even after just the first coat of finish.
I'm incredibly relieved that everything worked out. There was a lot of stress around it all due to a tight timeline to get the work done, but we got through it. Main downside of it is I'm going to have to completely repaint most of my freshly painted walls again due largely to the mess of the first contractor, but that is a small price to pay. Ironically, contractor #2 was the lowest bid of the 3 initial quotes I got, which was one of the reasons I didn't go with him first.
If anyone wants more specifics on anything, let me know. For now, I'm going to go enjoy my new floors.

Clarkson's Columns: "Porn is Ruining Sex" & The Wimpy Jeepy Renegade

This tsunami of online porn is ruining sex for real people — and Mr Darcy hasn't helped either
By Jeremy Clarkson (Sunday Times, Feb. 7)
We like to imagine that the internet is for looking up bird calls and important historical dates and where George Washington was born. But actually at least 25 per cent of all online searches are for pornography. So we were given a research tool that allows us to access all human learning and all human understanding, and what we do with this vast electronic library is use it to watch people mating.
Right now, almost 4.7 billion people on the planet have access to the internet. And each year hundreds of billions of sex video clips are viewed online. You think your kid spent last week in his room doing home schooling? Dream on, Grandad.
And it's not just the number of people watching porn that boggles the mind, but the number of people who must be making it. If you had decided at the start of the first lockdown to sit and watch all the material on the Pornhub website alone, how long do you think it would have taken? A week? A month?
Nope. The actual answer — and I'm not making this up — is 173 years, according to one report.
So where's this waterfall of sex coming from? I guess the only answer, really, is absolutely everywhere. Keep going for long enough and eventually you'll find your old music teacher on there, doing the deed with your milkman.
And now it's time to put on a serious face, because the ease of access to this torrent of porn has a great many people very worried. Though when I say "people", what I mean is "women". They say online pornography gives impressionable boys an unrealistic view of what sex is, and what it means and what's acceptable. And I have to say that there may well be some truth to this.
If you were to use the internet as a research tool, you would deduce that all lesbians are in fact 6-foot blonde Ukrainians who sit around all day in stockings and suspenders. None of them ever wears Birkenstocks or dungarees.
Meanwhile, all straight women are up for anything that pops into their partner's head. If he gets all his sex education from Pornhub, a young man will think that there's something wrong with him if his girlfriend doesn't invite her best-looking friend to join them between the sheets. And that he's not doing it properly unless he pulls her hair and strangles her while she's hanging upside down from a wardrobe door.
But the truth is that many women don't like to feel as if they've been interrogated by the CIA in Guantanamo Bay. Or pushed down a flight of stairs by a burly marine.
Porn is an issue in marriages, too, because if a man spends all day watching perfectly toned couples at it for hours in a variety of positions, it sows the seed of disappointment when his other half comes home from work and spends all evening eating lard and breaking wind.
I hate to use the expression "in my day", but in my day pornography was a hint of nipple in a glossy magazine and sex was something that came along infrequently, and only after several dates. Furthermore, it was conducted in a manner learnt from looking at the pictures in biology books.
I'm not suggesting that a lights-out, missionary approach is the way forward, because, of course, everyone has different tastes. Nor am I suggesting that "love" must always be a feature, because that's difficult if you're in an alley round the back of a pub in Rotherham with someone you met 15 minutes ago.
But I do worry that modern-day internet pornography is giving teenage boys a sense that sex must always be an American Psycho performance of some sort. That if you're not having it in a pod on the London Eye, you're doing something wrong. And I therefore sympathise with women who find this both worrying in theory and wearisome in practice.
However, there's a flipside to this coin, because while porn is giving boys a warped idea of what's meant by sex and romance, period drama is doing the exact same thing to girls.
They all fell in love with Mr Darcy, and now us boys are expected to spend our days in frilly white shirts, walking out of lakes. And it's considered rude if we don't notice when a woman moves a chair back slightly from the dinner table so we can see a hint of ankle.
Period drama tells us that girls communicate by twiddling their hair and moving their eyebrows, but it's a language boys don't understand. You might as well reveal you fancy us by saying: "Ich mag dich."
I would say, therefore, that any television drama that begins with a horse and carriage crunching to a halt outside an agreeable stately home is just as damaging to boy-girl relationships as YouPorn.
There's a similar problem with chickflick romcoms as well. Thanks to Richard Gere and others of his ilk, a boy is now expected to win the girl of his dreams by arriving for a date sticking out of the top of a white limo with a bunch of red roses in his hand and Verdi's La Traviata on the stereo.
And I'm sorry, girls, but if you expect a boy to pick you up from your job on the factory floor in a crisp white naval uniform and then carry you off to bed on a wave of Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes, you can hardly complain when you get there if he asks you to slip into a PVC gimp suit.
In short, then, men and boys should agree to give up watching pornography if women and girls agree to give up watching chick flicks and romantic dramas with Colin Firth in them. Because then neither of us would have any unrealistic expectations.
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Do I feel lucky? Not in this unmighty mouse. The Clarkson Review: Jeep Renegade
By Jeremy Clarkson (Sunday Times, Feb. 7)
About a week into the most recent lockdown I decided to go on holiday. I'd had enough. I hadn't seen the sun for weeks, I hadn't been warm for months and I'd recently had Covid-19, so I wasn't in any danger of catching it again or passing it on.
Yes, I knew I shouldn't go away and that I'd be in serious trouble with every curtain-twitcher in the country if I were caught, but I decided I'd put on a big face mask and a T-shirt saying "I am Piers Morgan" and run the gauntlet.
I did some research, found a spot in the Caribbean that was open for business, and even some flights. So I'd tell the authorities I needed to do important research for work, pack a bottle of factor 8 and bugger off.
I was quite excited. I like messing with authority. Always have. Very early in my school career I decided that, before I left, I'd break every rule in the book. And then, having achieved this by the age of 16, I decided to break some rules they hadn't even thought of yet. This meant smoking in chapel, doing an entire chemistry lesson naked from the waist down and doing handbrake turns on the new all-weather sports pitches in my mum's Audi 80. One night I even put Polyfilla in every single lock in every single door in the entire school.
I've had that attitude my entire life, and so when I'm told to wear a mask and keep my distance and stay at home, I find it very easy to think: "Right. Good idea. I'm off to Antigua."
There's no way I'd have been caught. I'd even figured out that I had no television work until April, so no one would ever see the tan. But then, just two days before the planned departure, I realised that, actually, my holiday would be morally wrong. So, much as I don't like being the school swot, I didn't go.
There's more. I have not been to Barnard Castle and I have not hosted an orgy in a Manchester apartment with a colleague and some young Instagram enthusiasts. And, for the most part, I have not been out unless it was absolutely necessary.
This meant that, for many days, I was not able to drive the Jeep Renegade that I had on test. This is the manliest-sounding car yet made. It's a Jeep, which means it can trace its bloodline back to the Second World War machine that General George Marshall described as "America's greatest contribution to modern warfare". And it's called a Renegade, which means it's the sort of car that would smoke a cheroot and wear a poncho and ask its rivals if they think they're feeling lucky.
Even the trim levels are taken straight from Clint Eastwood's back catalogue. There's the Longitude and the Night Eagle and the Trailhawk, and all of this is very odd, because if you peel away the badges and the body, what you find underneath is a Fiat 500X.
I therefore didn't mind not driving it. Because why would anyone want to drive a mouse in a gunslinger outfit?
However, then it snowed and that changed everything. Yes, the government was still saying we all had to stay indoors, washing our hands and wearing a face condom whenever we spoke, but when you have a four-wheel-drive car and it snows, no government guideline is going to keep you inside.
You've put up with the fuel consumption and the guilt and the awful handling all year, so on the one day of the year when the weather actually makes such a car worthwhile, you're going to invent a reason why you simply must go for a spin in it.
I therefore decided it was essential I drive the Clint Mouse to a nearby village to pick up some lunch. And on the way I witnessed a strange phenomenon that snow brings out in 4x4 drivers.
On a normal day, if you are on a single-track road and a big off-roader is coming the other way, you are expected to move over. But when it's snowing, quite the reverse is true. People with 4x4s will gladly drive onto the verge and into hedges and up near-vertical banks to let you by. It's a way of showing you they'd been wise to buy a Chelsea tractor.
I encountered one man coming the other way in a BMW X5 and it was hilarious. So determined was he to demonstrate the off-road prowess of his 4x4, he bloody nearly rolled it over. Another, with a cheery wave, drove his Mercedes G-wagen into a swamp.
Now, at this point you're probably expecting me to say that I was managing perfectly well in my little Jeep and that I didn't need oncoming motorists to perform automotive suicide on my behalf. But that would be wide of the mark, because the Jeep was, in fact, hopeless.
There are many models to choose from and many different engines. Most have only two-wheel drive, which means they aren't really Jeeps at all. But mine was a four-wheel-drive plug-in hybrid called the Trailhawk 4xe.
Let's start with the bad points.
At £36,500 it is more expensive than it feels, and at almost 1.6 tons it's heavier too. Also the steering is vague, the engine is coarse, the gearbox is constantly confused, the wind noise is laughable and the interior looks like a Sanyo music centre from the late 1970s.
And now it's time to move on to the really bad points. There's nowhere comfortable to put your left foot when you are driving along, the seats have all the give of a bodger's wheelback chair, and while the performance appears to be there on paper, there's no evidence of it in real life.
It's the same story with fuel consumption. We're told it can return about 128mpg, but reports suggest that in the real world it'll struggle to do half that.
But what of the off-road ability?
Well, the Trailhawk badge means that it has successfully completed the 22-mile Rubicon trail that largely crosses the Sierra Nevada mountains in California, and that sounds impressive. But I've driven this route and can report that it's mostly granite, which has a grip level somewhere between glue and those gloves Tom Cruise had in Mission: Impossible — Ghost Protocol. If one wheel is touching the ground, even slightly, you will be able to keep going.
Oxfordshire in the snow is an entirely different proposition and, as a result, the Jeep kept darting around as though I'd inadvertently selected "bowel loosening" mode instead of Snow in the settings. And, of course, normal tyres meant it was useless in the rough stuff.
I worry too about the complexities of a hybrid system in which an electric motor and a lithium-ion battery are used to propel the rear wheels and the engine is used to drive those at the front. Will that last for a long time, and what happens if you try to ford a river? Will you end up electrocuting all the trout?
Actually, scratch that. I don't worry about this at all. It's irrelevant, because you're not going to buy this car. No one is, unless they are completely mad.
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And here's the Sun column: "Cladding removal should begin not tomorrow morning, not this afternoon, NOW"

My dad lunged at me yesterday in order to hurt me physically and mom defended him when the cops were called

UPDATE:
Just to clarify, my sister is 15 years old, not my girlfriend. My girlfriend is 19 and currently in the process of moving out. I had to clarify this because i’ve been getting some comments and messages from people regarding this
My uncle has died of covid. Mom is taking it really hard and the guilt of everything going on in the last couple of days is getting to her. She apologized to me and told me that she loves me, but I just don’t know how to feel right now. I’ve contacted CPS and hopefully they’ll be on top of the case. I will also be getting my unemployment check soon, and i’m also selling some things to save up some more money. Thank you all for your kind words and i’ll definitely be updating this post more.
Anyway, here’s the original post:
It really sucks that I have to post here twice, but things seem to get worse and I just don’t know what to do.
I wrote a post here earlier about how my uncle is dying from corona and how my moms insane Jehovah’s witness family we’re trying to use this as means to indoctrinate my cousin, so that’s what i’m referring to.
For a bit of context, i’m a 20 year old male and I suffer from a series of mental disorders. Mom and Dad are hardcore religious and conservative, so they both think i’m faking it and it’s a “product of the devil” or whatever bullshit they tell me, so for the past 12 years, they’ve gaslighted me and really tried to manipulate me into thinking that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me. Throughout my teenage years, they would blame my mental illness on a “phase” and would beat me whenever I acted out or tried to defend myself. It’s not even like i’m so mentally ill that i’m clinically insane or depending on them to live, I just have ADHD, MDD, some anxiety disorder and PTSD. I can handle daily life to a certain extent, and it’s not like i’m useless, so I just don’t understand why they have to treat me like some sort of psychopath. I blame my deteriorating mental health to their horrible parenting, their genetics and the way I was raised in my mother’s religion. The JWs teachings state that it’s ok to physically discipline your child, but mom and dad took this as an excuse to beat the living shit out of me. I’ve gotten hit with a heavy studded belt, punched multiple times across the chest and stomach, stepped on with heavy work boots, smacked across the face with an open hand, beaten with tv cords, etc. So much for discipline; more like violence toward your child.
You see, i’m not allowed to show negative emotions in this house. I’m terrible at managing my anger and sadness because of how much they’ve tried to suppress my emotions. Whenever i’m angry and I try to express it, they yell at me and call me names. Whenever i’m sad and at the brink of tears, they call me manipulative or say that men don’t cry. Because of this reason, I have so much pent up anger and sadness that I randomly start to cry out of frustration and I feel like I’m gonna pass out. Even with the signs of me having a breakdown or having a panic attack, they still find a way to make me feel worse and suppress my emotions even further. Mom is especially guilty of this. She cries at everything and has major anger issues, so out of anyone, I would expect her to be more sympathetic of my situation.
I know how toxic it is for me living at home and dealing with my shitty parents, but unfortunately due to many reasons outside of my control, I haven’t been able to leave. I had a bit of money saved up by 2020 and I planned on moving to Southern California to start fresh and try to crash at my older sisters place while I got settled, but due to Corona, I had to spend my savings and I am now jobless, broke and with no sign of getting a job anytime soon. I haven’t been in contact with any of my mental health professionals either, so i’m not really able to manage my emotions anymore. Everything is getting so fucking difficult and I unfortunately can’t do much about it. My mental health is slowly deteriorating, and i’ve contemplated suicide multiple times in the last 5 months. Everything looks so bleak. I don’t have the support from my parents either, instead I just get insulted by them whenever i’m “acting up” emotionally or whatever the fuck they wanna call it.
Now that a bit of context has been given, here’s what happened. I tend to be over dramatic and playful with everything, so I make dumb gestures and bizarre noises. This is because of my ADHD and my personality, there’s no moment in my life where i’m not smiling or laughing and I love to be playful and exaggerated. Well, I was in the kitchen and everything was fine. Dad was cooking burgers and mom was doing whatever, I can’t recall what. There was a bag of mangos on the kitchen table and I reached out to grab it. The knot was really tight and I was struggling to open the plastic bag, so in an exaggerated way, I ripped the bag open and made a growling noise, to make it seem like i’m playfully struggling to open the bag. I don’t know why this was such a big deal to my scumbag father, because this set him off and he immediately started insulting me. He told me to control myself and to act like a proper fucking human being or whatever he said. I can’t believe he would go off at something so meaningless and harmless as that, so I gave him a bewildered and slightly angry look, and he proceeded to start yelling at me even worse and insult me further. I’ve had about enough of their abuse, and lately i’ve realized that if I don’t defend myself, then no one will. I stood up for myself at first and didn’t raise my voice; I just protested at the way that this asshole was talking to me, but this set him off even MORE. My parents have this dumbass rule where they will treat me however they want, and I can’t even raise my voice at them because it’s immediately a sign of disrespect and a threat to them for some reason. Well, there was more of the incoherent arguing between me, dad and mom, so essentially, dad shoved me hard with his forearm and elbow and I proceeded to shove him back, so he lunged at me and I fought back. Mom got in between us so we wouldn’t get hurt. He was going for my neck and trying to hold my arms, so I punched him twice in the head. Meanwhile, mom just kept yelling and trying to break it up. We have this kitchen closet, I guess you could call it, where dad kept pushing me into. He didn’t show any sign of trying to back off, so I grabbed a bottle of hot sauce and tried to break it on his head, but I couldn’t. Mom got some sauce on her shirt. Well, the situation eventually deescalated and I went to my room. I was kicked out of the house by dad. I was getting ready to pack my things and leave, when mom came into my room and started to talk to me. She asked what I was doing and I told her I just got kicked out and that I was leaving anyway. She asked me where I would go, since I have no money and nowhere to stay, and I told her that anywhere is better than here. I was packing up and ready to leave when I realized that I fear for me and my little sisters safety. Dad is an abusive, cheating, lying and violent man, and yesterday proved that anything can and will set him off. There is nothing that tells me that he will calm down after this, if anything, this would probably set him off even more and he might try to hurt me again, so I did the only logical thing I could do; call the police.
Essentially, we sat down outside of my house and I told the police my side of the story. Mom told hers and so did dad, but what made me realize a lot of things is how mom explained things to the cops and how much she started blaming me for things. She downright lied to the cops and told them that i’m a violent person, that we both were uncontrollable and no matter who started it, we both got violent. Mom brought up her stupid fucking religion for some reason and started arguing with me in front of the cops. They just kept looking at mom with a sort of angry look, since she was just shit talking them and being very difficult. She called one of her dumbass family members and told them that I called the cops and am “falsely accusing my dad of hitting him” which, first of all, I never told the cops that he hit me, only that there was a domestic altercation and that he tried to assault me, and second of all, it was really unnecessary and dramatic of her to be telling her family of the altercation. Mom is a two way snake and she has never taken my side when it comes to dads abuse. Today proved it well and the writing is on the wall. The cops were more annoyed at mom and dad then they were concerned of the situation, so they made them promise that i’m not getting kicked out and i’ll at least have a place to sleep for the night. Mom really lied to the cops, telling them that they never told me that i’m not allowed back at home anymore, when they both told me that i’m leaving and not coming back. It honestly baffles me how much of a piece of shit my mother is by defending this well known abuser who’s cheated on her in the past, savagely beat both me and my little sister to the brink of bruises, blood and even some possible brain damage and shows no remorse for his actions.
After the police left, I had a talk with my little sister, where she told me that there was no reason for dad to go off at something as stupid as ripping up a bag of mangos. She told me how she heard a lot of the confrontation and how wrong mom and dad are for treating me the way that they do. Mom is a victimizing, manipulative bitch and dad is just outright a horrible human being. I fear for my little sisters safety, as she’s only 15 and many times in the recent past have these two pieces of filth told her that they will beat her silly, no matter if they go to prison or get deported (they’re hispanic-italian immigrants).
I’m now in my room, wondering what i’ll do. The only other thing I can think of is moving in with my girlfriend, but her home life isn’t much better than mine and she’s waiting to move out herself. I honestly don’t wanna leave without thinking about the security of my little sister. She’s 15, but in no way is she able to take care of herself and it’s honestly a horrible idea to leave her alone at the care of these monsters. I really need help with this, so if there’s any advice, support, shoulder to cry on or anything you guys can provide me with, that would be very much appreciated. I’m at rock bottom right now and I have nothing left. Thanks for reading this rant.

Housewife highlights/Daily shit talk - February 9th, 2021

NEW YORK

Dorinda Medley Admits She Misses ‘Real Housewives of New York City’ Already: I Was a ‘Great’ Housewife (US Weekly exclusive)

“My mother said to me when the whole thing happened with Housewives, ‘Sometimes God does for you that what you cannot do for yourself,’” Medley exclusively told Us on Thursday, February 4, while promoting her partnership with Nutrisystem. “And it’s been a blessing to have the time off, because every once in a while, it’s important to stop reset, think, regroup. Because we get lost, right? Lost in whatever this is: Housewife fame. The city. Wants, desires.”
The Massachusetts native noted that it has been “really nice just to kind of reset and find Dorinda again. Not Dorinda the Housewife. Not Dorinda, John Dan’s daughter. Not Dorinda, Richard’s wife. Just Dorinda. I found it very empowering.”
Medley explained that her break amid the coronavirus pandemic has led to a “beautiful reset.” She has been spending a lot of time at Blue Stone Manor, her Massachusetts estate, and with her parents, which she said she “never really” had the chance to do years prior.
The entrepreneur revealed that she feels “happy” after gaining some distance from the Housewife world, telling Us that she has “no hard feelings” about how it ended.
“I was very quiet because I don’t have any bad feelings about it. I think everything has a time and a place,” she said. “And I think that that was their decision. Things change and you have to accept change. And a lot of times, if you sit quietly and you wait, it ends up being the best thing for you.”
Medley’s friendships with her castmates have also remained intact, five months after her departure.
“I’m still very close to everybody. I feel positive about it,” she explained. “You know, Andy [Cohen] checks in every once in a while and everyone checks in. I was really friends with these people. They were part of my life before the show. This wasn’t a show thing. This was a real thing.”
Medley is pleased with how her life is going post-RHONY, but she revealed that there are parts about the show she misses, saying, “I was a great housewife. I brought it!”
Looking back, the TV personality explained that she “really enjoyed” being a part of the franchise and is pleased that she “let the audience see me just as I am.”
She continued: “You could love me. You can hate it. I am an authentic person. Like you’ve met me in real life. I’m not really different in real life than I am on the show. So, I’ve really grown to respect myself for that. Like me, hate me. I’m doing Dorinda Medley. And I always make it nice.”
Since announcing her exit in August 2020, after six seasons on the show, Medley has kept busy by partnering with Nutrisystem. After gaining almost 15 pounds amid the pandemic, the former Bravo star turned to the weight loss program to slim down, telling Us that she is “getting close” to her goal weight of 125 pounds.
“This is easy. It’s color-coded,” she said of the program. “They personalize it for you. It shows up at your door, which for me was everything. Because I don’t know about you, but I was so sick of going to the grocery store, just the whole plan, trying to figure out what to eat. I was so sick of cooking and to try to curate something and still do it myself during COVID, it was just too much.”

How celebrities are enjoying Super Bowl 2021 from home (Page Six) - ft. Ramona Singer, Bethenny Frankel and bonus Joe Giudice

ORANGE COUNTY

Tamra Judge Doesn’t Want ‘RHOC’ to Be Canceled, Teases Possible Return to the Show With Heather Dubrow (US Weekly exclusive)

“I heard so many rumors that they’re going to recast the show, that they’re going to cancel it. They’re going to delay it. So, I really don’t know. I don’t have any inside information, that’s for sure,” the former reality star, 53, told Us Weekly exclusively on Thursday, February 4, while discussing her VENA Wellness CBD line. “I don’t want to see Orange County get canceled.”
She added, “I was a big part of that show being successful and I’m hoping that they can carry that on, whatever that means. People keep going, ‘You’re going back, you’re going back,’ and I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know if I’ll be asked back.”
Judge noted that “there would have to be a lot of discussions” before she would officially return to the Bravo hit. “It’s not one of those things where I’m like, ‘Yeah, I’m dying to go back.’ And it depends on the cast. If it’s a good cast, then yeah, but if it’s a really bad cast, it can really change things and make it not fun and not worth the stress,” she explained. “But, I mean, I would love to see Heather [Dubrow] come back. I would like to come back with Heather and get rid of some of the people that are currently on the show that just have been played out.”
Judge revealed to Us that she hasn’t “really watched” the series since her exit. “I tried to remove myself as much as I could from it just because it’s part of the healing process and moving forward,” she shared, noting that “it’s been difficult” trying to disassociate herself a bit while wanting to “connect with my fans.”
Instead of focusing on making her way back to RHOC, Judge is working on releasing a CBD skincare line to expand VENA Wellness CBD, which she cofounded with her husband Eddie Judge. “I’m launching a CBD skincare line, so that will come out in a few months,” the former Bravo personality, who also runs the CUT Fitness gym with Eddie, 47, in Rancho Santa Margarita, California, explained to Us. “[I] always have new products.”

Vicki Gunvalson Opens Up About Family And Other Rumors (Celebuzz exclusive)

“There have been lots of rumors and speculation surrounding my decision to sell the lake home I had recently purchased in North Carolina,” Vicki told us. “As those who follow my family and I, Ryan and Briana recently announced that they were moving from North Carolina to Illinois. Then, Ryan ended up getting a last-minute huge job offer in Oklahoma City that he ended up taking from his Toys for Tots Marine connection.”
“This will allow Briana to stay home with her newborn for at least a year and will allow the boys to return to school and sports full time, which is what they are needing,” Vicki continued. “They have already sold their home in one day and purchased a new beautiful home in Oklahoma. They are very excited. Me? Well initially I wasn’t as happy as if they were moving to IL which is where we are from, but I’ve come to love Oklahoma and the people there, and I’m confident this is the right move for them at this time in their lives. Our family definitely moves quickly on decisions.”
“If they were staying in North Carolina, I would have kept the house so I had a place of my own to be closer to them and my grandchildren; however, with them moving, it doesn’t make sense to keep it anymore,” she said. “The home is completely remodeled and is in move in condition and ready for a family who loves a log cabin home.”
“As far as if I will buy a home in Oklahoma City, the answer is not right now, and not just yet,” she said. “Ryan and Briana have purchased a home that is 5 bedrooms, 4 baths and is on 2+ acres and has their own beautiful swimming pool in the backyard which means they have a guest room for me when I come visit. So for now, Orange County to Oklahoma will be my new flight plan route instead of Orange County to NC.”
“One other thing I’d like to address is people who have questioned my financial stability including some who have shown concern-due to it being revealed that I was selling the lake home coupled with the fact that I am no longer on The Real Housewives of Orange County,” Vicki explained. “I haven’t been on RHOC for over a year now, and I’m financially doing great in the midst of a world pandemic. I’ve always owned several real estate properties, and this was a good ‘flip’ house for me.”
“It’s almost as if people forget that I own a very successful insurance company called Coto Insurance for much longer than I was on RHOC,” she said. “I specialize in ensuring my clients are financially protected for their future. It’s really ignorant for people to make assumptions that I wouldn’t be smart enough to do the same for my own future. I'm not poor by any means, and am very proud of my business Coto Insurance and the equity and savings I have.”
“I own 4 homes, and some are paid off…people are so mean and clueless.”
SALT LAKE CITY

Lisa Barlow Fires Back At Katie Maloney’s Diss Over “Sundance Queen” Title And Calls Lala Kent “Flawless,” Plus She Says “Two” RHOSLC Cast Members Are “Obsessed With Fame” (Behind the Velvet Rope podcast/Reality Blurb)

"Lisa is finally clapping back at Katie after the Vanderpump Rules star shaded Lisa’s “Sundance Queen” title by claiming she has “never heard” of her.
Lisa joined the Behind the Velvet Rope podcast and was asked to respond to the Pucker and Pout blogger’s apparent snub.
“Well, she has to ask to get in a place,” claimed the Vida Tequila owner. “Like, I mean, that’s weird. You have to know someone at the door to get in a place. Like, I think that’s weird. And you know, she’s probably not at the parties I’m putting on either.”
Lisa added, “She probably works with different people than I do. Oh well, not everyone has to know who I am…. [but] she does now.”
When it comes to Katie’s co-star Lala, though, Lisa says she’s in awe of the mother-to-be’s beauty.
“I think Lala Kent is beautiful, she professed. “Like, her face is just gorgeous. When I look at Lala Kent I’m like, quintessential Utah girl, like, flawless face. I think Utah girls are so gorgeous and Lala is hands down flawless. Her face to me is perfect.”
As Lisa was dishing on her own castmates, she offered an interesting, diplomatic response when asked if she thinks Mary is truly authentic or just “crazy.”
“I love Mary’s facial expressions,” she claimed. “I don’t even know if I can move my face like that, like, she could literally give [actor] Jim Carrey a run for [his] money. I mean, Mary’s facial expressions, like literally I want to say something and say, ‘insert Mary’s facial expression here.’ She’s like super – you know, Mary’s Mary and she’s complex. I don’t know all the layers of Mary, I know what Mary tells me about Mary.”
Although she was diplomatic while sharing her opinion of Mary, Lisa doesn’t afford the same courtesy to Whitney Rose or Heather Gay. She doesn’t actually mention the ladies by name, but one could simply use the process of elimination as Lisa claims she, Meredith Marks, Jen Shah, and Mary aren’t obsessed with camera time like the “two” of their castmates seem to be.
“I would think two of them did it for just fame and are like obsessed with fame,” she alleged. “For me, I didn’t go into it for that reason. I’m proud of what I accomplished [and] I’m not embarrassed of anything.”
BEVERLY HILLS

Dorit Kemsley defends Erika Jayne amid legal drama (Page Six)

"Dorit Kemsley is in her “RHOBH” co-star Erika Jayne’s corner.
Kemsley, 44, defended Jayne, 49, on Twitter amid her growing legal troubles, asking people to “give her a break already!”
On Sunday, well-known attorney Ronald Richards shared a pic that Jayne had posted to Instagram, questioning whether it had been snapped inside the Pasadena home she once shared with her estranged husband, Tom Girardi — which could be problematic in the bankruptcy cases against Tom.
“I can 100% confirm this was NOT at the Pasadena home,” Kemsley responded hours later. “Please, give her a break already! Innocent until proven guilty. This has moved beyond reporting to full on bullying.”
The Post previously reported that Jayne moved out of the $16 million Pasadena estate and into a $1.5 million home in January. The Pasadena home was burglarized last month and detectives are reportedly unsure of what was taken from the mansion.
Richards’ claim could throw a wrench in things legally for the exes as the Pasadena house has assets that could be seized as part of the involuntary bankruptcy cases against Tom. Additionally, his assets were frozen in regards to a class-action suit against him, and now it is unclear what is missing since cops don’t know what was actually taken from the home. If Jayne brought things into the home or removed anything from the home, she could possibly face legal ramifications.
Jayne, whose real name is Erika Girardi, remained mum on the location of her photo, but thanked Kemsley for her support.
Meanwhile, a source close to the singer told us on Monday that the “photo was taken in Del Mar, where they were shooting the show.”
“Erika is doing OK but it’s hard since she is getting bullied right and left,” the insider added. “The season is going great she is saying as much as she can and telling her story. Most of the ladies have been very supportive except a few.”

Adrienne Maloof Explains When She Knew Her Time Was Up On RHOBH And Talks Paul Nassif Divorce, Plus She Shares Why She Joined Show And Looks Back On Russell Armstrong’s Passing (Josh Flagg Youtube/Reality Blurb)

"Adrienne Maloof looked back at her time on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills during a recent interview with Million Dollar Listing: Los Angeles cast member Josh Flagg.
Years after leaving the show after three seasons, Adrienne explained how she was initially cast for the Bravo reality series before opening up about the ups and downs she and her castmates experienced due to Russell Armstrong‘s suicide and sharing the moment she knew her time with the network had expired.
“I was approached through my husband at the time, Dr. Paul Nassif. He had a PR person and she said, ‘They’re casting and I think you’d be [good],’” Adrienne revealed to Josh on his YouTube channel.
As Adrienne explained, Paul, who now appears on Botched, got a PR person after appearing on a few episodes of Dr. 90210.
“I was extremely hesitant, very hesitant. But Paul was… ‘Come on, it will be fun, something you’ve never done before,’” Adrienne recalled. “Of course he was doing it also for himself. Being a plastic surgeon, he’s promoting himself, and honestly, I thought the same thing. I’m a businesswoman so I see the platform.”
According to Adrienne, her former spouse should be “thanking [her], profusely” for agreeing to appear on RHOBH.
“Financially and otherwise,” she noted.
After signing on as one of the final two housewives to join the show, with the other being Camille Grammer, Adrienne pitched Taylor Armstrong to the network and ultimately began filming what she believes was a “fantastic” first season.
“We were a hit. People always say there’s nothing like the first three seasons. I think it was just the chemistry of the six women. We all were very diverse [and] we weren’t just doing lunch,” Adrienne explained. “We were working, making a difference, having fun, but having real drama. [And] when I say real drama, you couldn’t get much deeper than what we went through.”
Throughout the first three seasons of RHOBH, fans watched as Camille got divorced and learned that Taylor was allegedly being beaten by her late-ex-husband Russell before he died of an apparent suicide.
“[That] was horrible for all of us to go through. [It was a] very difficult time but very real,” Adrienne stated. “Season two was very traumatic for all of us but we managed to get through it. It was tough, very, very, very tough. But very real.”
As for the moment she knew her time on the show had come to an end, Adrienne revealed she had had enough following her split from Paul.
“Towards the end [of season three], I was going through a divorce. I think at that point, that was enough. When I tell you [you] have an expiration date, that for me was it,” she explained.
While Adrienne has “gone back and done appearances” on the show from time to time, she said she doesn’t believe she’ll ever return to her full-time position.
“I don’t think… I think things have moved on,” she shared, adding that she’s no longer close to her former castmates.
“I think we all go our certain ways when we’re done [with Real Housewives]. What’s left, really?” she wondered."

Brandi Glanville tells embattled Armie Hammer he can have her rib cage (Page Six)
Brandi Glanville claims ignorance after Armie Hammer tweet (Page Six)
Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave Competes In An Equestrian Show For The First Time In Three Years (Teddi Mellencamp Instagram/Bravo)

ATLANTA

Marlo Hampton Rocked Sexy Undies & a Crop Top for Her 45th Birthday (Marlo Hampton Instagram/Bravo)
Marlo Hampton Celebrated Her 45th Birthday With the Most Over-the-Top Gilded Cakes (Marlo Hampton Instagram/Bravo)

[Weekly Best of A2C] Flowchart Edition

Opinion: The GOP is not a normal party

https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2021/02/08/gop-is-not-normal-party/
Opinion by Jennifer RubinColumnistFeb. 8, 2021 at 7:45 a.m. ESTAdd to list
The few intellectually honest Republican officials recognize that the party is nothing more than a cult. Facing sanction from his state party for having the temerity to acknowledge reality and denounce racist insurrectionists, Sen. Ben Sasse (R-Neb.) responded in a video, “Let’s be clear about why this is happening. It’s because I still believe, as you used to, that politics isn’t about the weird worship of one guy.”
Rep. Liz Cheney (R-Wyo.) replied to her censure by her state party, “I think people all across Wyoming understand and recognize that our most important duty is to the Constitution. And as I’ve explained — and will continue to explain — to supporters all across the state and voters all across the state, the oath that I took to the Constitution compelled me to vote for impeachment.” She highlighted the insane views of her fellow party members. “They believe that BLM and antifa were behind what happened here at the Capitol. It’s just simply not the case. It’s not true,” she said. “And we’re going to have a lot of work we have to do. People have been lied to.”
The problem, of course, is that the party at large — elected members of Congress, state officials and a large portion of the base — believe or at least feign belief in the crackpottery of the former president, the QAnon congresswoman from Georgia (Marjorie Taylor Greene) and the conspiracies promulgated by cynical right-wing media moguls. Frankly, the ones feigning belief are the most reprehensible, because they willingly manipulate the base and undermine democracy for personal fame and power. (On NBC’s “Meet the Press,” Rep. Adam B. Schiff (D-Calif.) correctly analyzed that House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy “stands for nothing except the perpetuation of his own position. He has no values, and in my view cares about little except for hoping to be speaker one day. God forbid.”)
In what universe can the Republican Party recover some semblance of normalcy? Nearly 150 House Republicans voted to overturn the election results; 199 refused to strip Greene of her committee seats. All but 10 voted against impeachment to hold the former president accountable for insurrection. (And in case you thought Senate Republicans were any saner, Sen. Roger Wicker of Mississippi declared he is “not conceding that President Trump incited an insurrection.” He might check with Cheney and Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell — and the tens of millions of Americans who witnessed the events of Jan. 6.)
As if to confirm the looniness of his party, Sen. Ron Johnson (R-Wis.), a prime spreader of Russian disinformation during the first impeachment, now leverages conspiracy theories against House Speaker Nancy Pelosi: “We now know that 45 Republican senators believe it’s unconstitutional. Is this another diversionary operation? Is this meant to deflect away from potentially what the speaker knew and when she knew it? I don’t know, but I’m suspicious.” This is hogwash, but sadly par for the course for Johnson.
CNN’s John Harwood shared the reactions of some political scientists who see what too many in the media and political establishment refuse to acknowledge:

“The broad picture of the Republican Party is really ugly,” says Jack Pitney, a former national GOP official who now teaches political science at Claremont McKenna College in California. “A hot mess of nuts and cowards.”Larry Sabato, the nonpartisan director of the Center for Politics at the University of Virginia, has concluded after events of the past three months that America's two-party system now has one normally functioning entity and another that appears "insane."“The Republican Party is unsalvageable as a center-right party,” says Sabato. “You can’t treat the situation as normal.”

We therefore need to readjust how we evaluate politics. It is not a failure of “bipartisanship” when President Biden cannot get support for his covid-19 package from the “hot mess of nuts and cowards”; it is to be expected. It would not be vindication of the former president if he is acquitted in the Senate. It would evidence of the cowardice of the Wickers and the rank dishonesty of Johnson and their peers. The conduct of the GOP suggests we follow a few simple rules going forward when considering policy debates and political events.
First, Republicans’ process arguments are invariably false. The law and the precedent for convicting a president impeached while in office is clear. Those voting to acquit simply cannot bring themselves to condemn him for instigating a violent insurrection.
Second, it behooves the mainstream media to point out that Republicans have no policy positions. As such they are not conducting themselves as a legitimate party in the battle of ideas. They spend their time whining about “censorship” (from the floor of the House and on the largest cable news outlet). It is noteworthy that other than 10 Republican senators, congressional Republicans have no proposals for attacking the covid-19 pandemic, reviving the economy or anything that would alleviate Americans’ immediate or long-term hardships.
Third, the individual and corporate donors, news outlets, think tanks and other political organizations that continue to treat the GOP as a normal political party are contributing to the erosion of our democracy and the elevation of authoritarian-minded racists and conspiracy-mongers. They too should be held accountable. Consumers, stockholders, legitimate scholars, real media and ordinary individuals should withdraw support from and recognition of the enablers. The twin powers of the purse and of public shunning are useful tools in knocking down the pillars that support a decrepit party.
Finally, there are normal Republicans — aside from the rump group in Congress. There are many mayors, governors and statewide officials (e.g., secretaries of state). When we want to know “what Republicans think,” we should go to them if we want an honest, fact-based response. Some of them (e.g., Miami Mayor Francis Suarez, Ohio Gov. Mike DeWine, Maryland Gov. Larry Hogan) have made clear, for example, that federal covid aid is badly needed. Republican Govs. Phil Scott of Vermont and Charlie Baker of Massachusetts supported the first impeachment of Trump. In addition, Alabama’s Republican Gov. Kay Ivey “suggested Rep. Mo Brooks deserved a primary challenger for his role in riling up President Donald Trump’s supporters Wednesday before they barged into the Capitol Building,” the Daily Mail reported. If there is to be a sane alternative party to the Democrats, it will be made up of such figures. We should follow their actions and rhetoric, if we want to know what a normal center-right party would act like.

Miami day one: Trip report

Last week I wrote about how I was taking an exploratory trip to Florida. It's often cited as the last bastion of free living by /LockdownSkepticism, and I wanted to see for myself. I would seriously consider moving if it meant a vast improvement over the Bay Area's frothing-at-the-mouth Covid insanity.
Last night I red-eyed to Miami. Arriving too early to check into my hotel, I walked around the city for a few hours to get a feel for things. Around 11 I went back to my hotel, slept a few hours, then did another mission out to see more of the city in the daytime and evening. With it being Super Bowl Sunday and all, I feel like a I got a decent feel for how things are on the ground, which I'm writing up here in case this sub is interested. There's some good, and some bad.
First of all, Governor DeSantis has not required a state-wide mask mandate, and has refused to allow any penalties for not wearing masks, but some regional mask requirements/recommendations are still in effect, especially where the larger cities like Miami are concerned. ~All businesses are still complying on at least the surface-level, with employees masked, and everyone walking into the establishments masked as well. It's quite similar to the Bay Area in this regard.
But, spend some time around town, and you notice that Floridians are not quite as committed to idealogical zealotry as Californians are. Indoor and outdoor dining is open, and although everyone walks into a restaurant with a mask on, it's surrendered as soon as their first drink arrives.
I happened to be out for a drink on Valencia St in SF yesterday, and the vibe is completely different -- many (I should note though, not all) SF servers have basically adopted the attitude of "I'm going to bring you this drink, you fucking virus spigot, but don't expect me to be happy about it". I was amazed by the number of snide/passive-aggressive comments we got (again, this is SF) just inside of a <2 hour window, even following all of the rules. For example , "I'm coming up behind up, get your masks up", etc. You don't get that in Miami -- walking home tonight as the Super Bowl was going, many establishments had a look of pre-Covid normalcy -- people out enjoying themselves, and living life normally.
That's the queue where our statistically illiterate Bay Area brethern would normally jump in and say, "We'll in Florida they're okay with killing Grandma!" ... except that California has had more Covid cases by 100k than Florida, and so many in the last few months as to be making Florida look great by comparison. This week, California's finally started to downslide somewhat, and is about even with Florida. This definitively tells any honest person that restaurants being open is not a major factor in Covid spread. Floridians are no more into Grandma-killing than Californians are.
Personally, I'm holding off on overly crowded indoor dining for now, and was personally more interested in outdoor mask compliance. As discussed before, not even a shred of evidence has been posited that outdoor Covid spread is a greater-than-zero concern, and yet, as we in the Bay Area know all to well, it's become our generation's religion.
In Miami (again, city, it may be different in more rural areas), I was a little disappointed in that there was still quite a bit of outdoor mask wearing going on. That said, it was more like ~50%, rather than the >95%+ I'm used to back in SF. But that said, there were a couple good things:

As far as I could tell, no one calls anyone else out on wearing or not wearing a mask outside. My pet theory is that it's because (1) that critical mass has not quite been achieved (again, only ~50% adherence), and (sorry to bring race into this) (2) Miami's ethnic diversity is much greater, and this becomes a factor. A white, upper middle class man/woman (the demographic which karens disproportionately belong to) can bring themselves to call out another white, upper middle class man/woman, but in places like Miami a lot (not all, I'm generalizing somewhat here, skepticism is quite racial agnostic) of the people going maskless are big, robust-looking Latin or African Americans, and karen-courage gives out under these conditions.
I didn't see one instance of "traffic jumping" -- i.e. where a San Franciscan sees another human being coming at them on the sidewalk, and decides that it's preferable to put their life on the line by jumping out into active lanes of traffic rather than risk the chance of catching Covid from them. I see this 10+ times a day in the Bay Area.
I got the impression that a lot of people wearing masks were doing so for appearances sake, and not really married to the idea. There's a lot of this happening in the Bay Area too, but my guess is that there's far more here.

In conclusion: I'm undecided, and will see how the rest of the week goes. Admittedly, I was hoping for more of a slam dunk where life feels 95%+ normal, but that's not the case. It's more like 60% normal. Contrary to what I'd expected, weather in Feburary is actually kind of nice, but of course many things are worse: people really do drive like shit, and I haven't been too impressed by any of the parks so far. Wynwood is like a version of the Mission with better graffiti, except where the traffic is so awful that it's hard to cross the street. I'll check back in after looking into more of the city.

Masks are here to stay forever, the anal swab is coming to America, we will soon be forced to wear multiple masks, and it's already too late to relocate to escape this tyranny, says a man who has correctly predicted everything we have seen during the past year.

First off, let me say that I'm very glad I found this subreddit. It's like a breath of fresh air in these crazy times. Now to my post.
A few months ago, I discovered a guy on Twitter named Vin Armani (@vinamani). He is a cryptocurrency entrepreneur and former co-star of the Showtime reality TV series Gigolos. Back in early April, as the lockdowns were already in full swing, he fled with his family from California to the island of Saipan in the Northern Mariana Islands (which is a commonwealth of the US), where he remains today.
Why am I telling you about him? Well, he has this uncanny knack for being able to accurately predict what will happen in the future because of his unique understanding of patterns in human behavior throughout history, even dubbing himself "Vinstradamus". He has been way ahead of the curve since this Covid stuff all started.
For the last several months, he has said that we are going into what he calls the "Dim Age", an era very similar to the Dark Ages, where religious, magical and mystical thinking replaces material and logical thinking (this explains why it is impossible to use facts and logic against Covid cultists). He bases this on his understanding on the Indian guru P.R. Sarkar's Social Cycle Theory. Much like the Dark Ages were ruled by religion and mysticism, he says the Dim Age will be ruled by what he calls the "Church of Woke", which he now says has taken over most of the world (save for a few spots like the aforementioned Saipan). He also says that the "Church of Woke" is ruled by the "prince of this world", and the only true way to avoid it is to pray, fast, and submit to "The Most High" and to relocate to a place that has a culture that won't allow the "Church of Woke" to affect it (such as Saipan).
Anyway, what he's been saying about this Covid stuff is dystopian, but not too surprising if you are one of those that sees through the tyranny. He says that Covid does not exist as a material virus, but rather it is a memetic virus and a mass hysteria just like what the Salem Witch Trials were back in 1692. In fact, his "aha" moment to flee to Saipan is when he heard Trump refer to the virus as an "invisible enemy" because that's what they also said during the Witch Trials. He says that not only are masks here to stay forever (I'm not sure about social distancing), but they will become a new normal article of clothing, like shirts and pants, and that in this mystical/religious age we are entering, masks will be seen as talismans designed to ward off the "invisible enemy" and that wearing a mask means submission to the "prince of this world" and the "Church of Woke", and non-mask wearers will be seen as infidels and will be treated in a similar manner as non-Muslims in countries like Saudi Arabia.
He also compares the takeover of the "Church of Woke" to the Spanish Inquisition, in which people who pledged allegiance to the Roman Catholic Church but were then found disobeying its teachings later were the first ones targeted, then they went after the since-the-very-beginning nonbelievers later. The way he says it will work nowadays is, for example, if you used to wear a mask at the start of this Covid hysteria but later woke up and stopped wearing one, or if you got the Covid vaccine and later experienced bad side effects and changed your mind about getting the second dose, you will be one of the first ones targeted by the "Church of Woke" for being a turncoat. The ones who never wore a mask or got the vaccine will be better off in the short term (they will be the ones targeted next), but the ones who will continue to wear masks, get the vaccines, and basically succumb to the tyranny will be the best ones off in the long run, so long as they don't step out of line.
He also mentions Normative Social Influence, which explains why so many things have become normalized in society in the past year that we previously would have considered unthinkable. All the ridiculous things we have seen in the media (or from Fauci) about anal swabs and double and triple masking, and lies about how the virus can be spread, and what the symptoms of Covid are, among other things, are all just a tactic to influence the culture. And it doesn't matter what any politician has mandated, all the media/Fauci has to do is mention something ridiculous about Covid or masks, and the Covid cultists lap it up and start enforcing these things themselves regardless of what laws/mandates have been passed about it and whether or not the government/police is actually enforcing it.
Worst of all, he says that there is literally nothing we can do about the progression of this Covid tyranny. No amount of resistance or protesting will change things. In fact, he says those who resist the tyranny will be the first ones to perish. And your guns won't do anything about it either, he says. As far as relocating, he says that nowhere in the US mainland, not even the most podunk of areas, will be a safe haven by the end of this year. Not even Florida, South Dakota or any other "open" state; they will all be swallowed up by the "Church of Woke" as well. He also says that if you want to get out of the country to escape this, it's already too late and you should have done that months ago, as if every one of us was supposed to see the writing on the wall as well as he did and follow his lead.
He's a pretty condescending character, at least online, in the way that he keeps saying that "I've been telling you for months about what is coming and you haven't been listening #Vinstradamus", but how are we supposed to know he's always going to be right? About 99.9999% of people on Earth have no idea who he is, and I didn't discover him until a few months ago, so how was I (or anyone else) supposed to know back in March, April, May, June, etc. that all the stuff he was saying at the time was 100% going to come true?
Personally, I'm not a religious person and don't plan on being one. I used to believe in God when I was younger, even though I absolutely hated going to church on Sunday, but all this information about praying, fasting, and submitting to "The Most High" being the only way to survive "The Dim Age" is making me second-guess myself because it's coming from someone who has legitimate credentials about being able to see into the future that well. It seems like a very daunting task for me to have to change my life so radically like that. I've become more open to relocation (preferably to a place where I won't get mask-shamed, because masks are by far my least favorite part of this clown world we live in now), but the hardest thing about that, by far and away, would be saying goodbye to everything and everyone I love and hold dear here in the US mainland and adjusting to a different culture. I'm at a point where I'd rather stay here and become a martyr, even if that means I die within the next few years, than to radically change my life in the manner that I just described. We only have one life, so I might as well live it the way I want rather than have someone on the Internet shame me into a life I don't want to live. Plus, I don't know how much longer I can handle living in a masked-up, distanced, and force-vaccinated world anyway. Quality of life > quantity of life.
I know this is a ridiculously long post, and I apologize for that. I also know that some of you have an aversion to Twitter, but that is the platform that he uses most, so I am going to post some links below in case you want to go down the rabbit hole:
https://twitter.com/search?q=%23Vinstradamus&src=typed_query&f=live
https://twitter.com/search?q=from%3Avinarmani%20%23TheDimAge&src=typed_query&f=live
https://twitter.com/search?q=from%3Avinarmani%20%23ChurchOfWoke&src=typed_query&f=live

My Eventful COVID Marriage-Based Adjustment of Status ( I-485)/Petition For Alien Relative (I-130) Experience (Los Angeles-Based U.S. Citizen Perspective)

TL;DR Timeline for Los Angeles, CA at the bottom.
My husband (Nigerian) and I (female U.S. Citizen) met in mid-2019 on Tinder (for real, it's not just hookups on there haha), and began dating in Los Angeles, while he was in the US for the 4th time on a Business Visitor Visa (B1). After a whirlwind romance, and basically being inseparable, just the two of us got married at a Chapel (in a mall) in Las Vegas on November 22nd, 2019.
We weren’t aware of the 90 day rule when getting married. Coincidentally, we got married 10 days after my husband’s 90 days since entering the States ended.
We used the Simple Citizen website, instead of a lawyer, to file our initial Marriage-Based Adjustment of Status Petition (I-485), Petition For Alien Relative (I-130), Application for Travel Document (I-131), and Application for Employment Authorization (I-765) in Los Angeles, CA on February 3rd, 2020 (we filed on paper, not electronically, and sent it using UPS to receive tracking). Simple Citizen was an inexpensive and very thorough alternative to a traditional filing with a lawyer. They also easily included our information about using a joint sponsor. They had all of our documents quickly prepared and we experienced no requests for information or delays from USCIS.
The Chicago lockbox received our petition on February 5th, and we received our receipt numbers via text on February 13th (the physical receipt followed soon after). My husband went in for his biometrics on March 3rd, 2020; a few weeks before the Covid closures began (were also reused for a later biometrics notice that was canceled due to COVID from USCIS). The Case Tracker App updated to “Ready to be Scheduled for an Interview” sometime in April 2020.
My husband was approved for his Employment Authorization Document (EAD I-765)/Advance Parole (AP I-131) Combo Card, 5 months after filing on June 29th and received it on July 22nd. We also moved to another apartment in LA during the petition process and promptly informed them of our new address by filling out form AR-11 online. USCIS confirmed our new address through email about a week later.
Our interview was scheduled for February 3rd, 2021 (informed it was scheduled via Case Tracker on December 24, 2020 and notice received January 4th, 2021) at the USCIS Field Office in Los Angeles (300 N Los Angeles St rm 7631, Los Angeles, CA 90012). We woke up bright and early at 4:30 AM and left for the Field Office at 6:00 AM. A few days prior, we chose business casual attire to wear. My husband wore a plaid burgundy button-down shirt, black dress pants, his wedding band, and black dress shoes. I wore a pretty blue and gray floral sleeveless blouse, black dress pants, and black flats. I also wore short, dangly silver earrings, my wedding ring, a silver bracelet, and I brought a black blazer just in case I got cold. I didn’t wear any makeup because I never wear it anyway.
We had a straightforward and enjoyable interview that was scheduled for 7:15 am (one of the first ones of the day). We received the interview notice about a month prior to the scheduled appointment, but I was notified that it was scheduled 42 days before the actual appointment through the Case Tracker app. I couldn’t see the actual interview date in the app or on the USCIS system.
We parked in the garage (221 N Los Angeles St, Los Angeles, CA 90012) across from the Field Office for $17 (cards are accepted). It was early in the day and finding a parking spot was not hard at all. When we left the interview and returned to our car around 8:30 AM the garage was almost completely full, so plan accordingly for parking.
We arrived about 20 or 30 minutes late to the interview office due to the long line to enter USCIS Los Angeles in DTLA. We arrived at 6:40 am in the parking garage and had some trouble finding the correct building because we mistakenly went all around the courthouse looking for USCIS so that delayed us some. This happened because we foolishly followed behind a different couple and lost track of where they walked. This caused us to go to the courthouse instead. Luckily, we still had our phones, which are allowed as long as they are turned off during the interview, and found our way using google maps.
Once we found the Field Office the line to enter the building from the right was super long and slow-moving (this was the only line we could see at the time). Later, after already waiting in the slow line, we learned that there was another line on the left, if looking directly at the building, which was faster according to a man we thought was an Officer. I later learned that he was just a good samaritan who wanted to help people with early appointments get in on time (he was in the fast line and had been to this Field Office numerous times). We tested this theory by splitting up to see who would get near the front of the line first and periodically speaking on the phone to keep each other updated on our progress. I also called my mom to distract myself from the growing anxiety about being late (which could lead to a canceled interview/denied petition which then could lead to the deportation of my husband or restarting the whole tedious Petition process-as you could see I was getting frantic). Luckily I was able to stay calm.
Soon, my husband called and said he was near the front and I came back to the slow line. As I walked back to join my husband in the other line an Officer in the front of the building also confirmed that the other line was faster (the Officer wanted to know why I was leaving the fast line). The slow line/fast line theory seemed true based on my experience but I went back to join my husband in the slow line because he mistakenly thought he was closer than me. Thankfully, we had absolutely no problems as a result of being late (we both were worried while waiting outside in the line. I was probably more worried though). As you can see the anxiety of being late is no fun. I would recommend you arrive really early to be on the safe side. While going through the metal detectors and having our belongings x-rayed; I asked the Officer what was the fastest way to the USCIS Field Office. He let us know the way and once we got to the office, on the 8th floor, we were called into the interview soon after being checked in.
In the interview room, we were sworn in and then started the interview. The Officer (who was a very kind and chatty Latinx woman) wanted to see our passports and original birth certificates, our certified marriage certificate, my husband's EAD and DMV real ID application, my California driver’s license, and evidence of our relationship. Some of the questions she asked were: how we met, describe our first few dates, when we met each other’s parents, when we got married, questions about our siblings, what my husband does for work, what I do for work, when my husband entered the U.S. and on what visa, and when we moved in together. We were able to answer these questions together or she directed them to my husband. In all, she directed most of the questions at my husband and asked us our respective verification questions (SSN, mailing address, residential address, phone number, our parent’s names, and date of birth). I barely had to say anything the entire interview and all of the questions directed at us were easy as pie. We also brought a photo album and the Officer looked through it.
I definitely over-prepared for the interview with all the documents and evidence (I started prepping as soon as we got the interview notice a month prior). We also brought our joint sponsor’s tax returns and W-2’s from 2018 and 2019, employment letters from 2020 and 2021, and his last 2 month’s pay stubs. The Officer didn’t ask for any of those documents, which made up the bulk of all the things I printed (around 1200 pages). For some of the printing, Staples print services came in handy and I used CVS to print the pictures. The only thing the Officer asked us about our sponsor was how we knew him (he is a friend of my husband; they met through a previous contracting job). I also re-printed our entire Adjustment of Status application, but better to be too prepared than under right? The Officer looked at/kept roughly 100 pages of the stuff I brought.
The Officer kept the evidence of our relationship (bank statements, health insurance, trips, our pandemic puppy’s AKC and ICA registration which showed both of our last names, leases for the 2 apartments we rented in our time together, SoCal Gas and LADWP utility bills for the past 3 months, renters insurance for both apartments, couples therapy bill and video call screenshots, and about 30 photos of us with descriptions and dates on the back of them. We also provided pictures of our 2 apartments. The Officer said she wanted to copy our passports, my husband’s EAD and DMV Real ID application, and my driver’s license. Then she came back with our approval letter!
Overall, the interview was about 15 or 20 minutes. We are so happy and we had a really simple Adjustment of Status process overall! The main issue was delays due to COVID closures but everyone has been dealing with that.
Overall the waiting process has been, coincidentally, exactly a year (we sent in the petition on February 3rd, 2020 and we were approved Feb 3rd, 2021)! My husband sent in his medical exam (I-693) with our original petition in 2020 so that most likely allowed us to be approved during the interview. We are getting the conditional Green Card so we will apply for the 10-year green card (I-751 Petition) 3 months before the 2 year Green Card expires in November 2022.
My advice to you is not to worry (easier said than done, I was worrying basically the entire process). As long as you are in a real, loving marriage everything will be fine. Just be sure to have all the documents, evidence, and original (non-expired) identification (follow the interview notice carefully). Don't be afraid to over-prepare (start preparing as soon as or before you get the interview notice so that you won’t get overwhelmed) and don't try to rehearse your answers, as that may send red flags.
Also, take a ton of pictures of you and your spouse with family, friends, pets, in your home, on trips, and doing activities and print them (you can’t use any digital methods to show the pictures). Be sure to keep the pictures sorted so that you can use them in an album, with dates and descriptions.
Wait patiently for the slow process to progress and eventually, the interview notice will appear (make sure you have a secure location to receive the notices. We have a PO Box at UPS). Using the free Visa Journey website was an especially helpful and reliable way to see when you may have petition milestones as everyone updates their timelines depending on the type of petition they are filing Be sure to update your timeline too so that you can help others. In the interview just act natural and look at it like a conversation/sharing the journey of your relationship/marriage with the Officer. I hope this helped to ease your anxiety about this process and I wish you all the best!
TL;DR Timeline for Los Angeles, CA:
Married in Las Vegas: 11/22/19
Sent in Petition via UPS (I-485, I-130, I-131, I-765 and included Medical Exam I-693): 2/3/20
Petition Received at Chicago Lockbox (notified via Case Tracker App): 2/5/20
Receipt Numbers Texted to Us: 2/13/20
Receipt Numbers Received by Mail: 2/20/20
Biometrics Appointment Notice Received by Mail: 2/25/20
Biometrics Appointment (also reused for later biometrics appointment notice that was canceled due to COVID): 3/3/20
Case Tracker App Updated to "Ready to be Scheduled for an Interview": Sometime in April 2020
EAD (I-765)/AP Combo Card (I-131) Approved, notified via Case tracker App: 6/29/20
EAD/AP Combo Card Received: 7/22/20
Case Tracker App Updated to Interview Scheduled: 12/24/20
Interview Date Notice Received: 1/2/21
Interview/Approval of I-485 (approved in the interview, coincidentally, exactly a year later): 2/3/21
Conditional Green Card Received: 2/10/21

$SPCB Explosive Potential, Good Catalyst.

Reclassify Tutors as Independent Contractors

Hello,
I have to mention that I am new to Reddit and smallbusiness so please correct me if I am breaking any rules. I would happily make adjustments.
I am aware that this is a bit of a hot button issue that has some tricky details to navigate. I am wanting to know if I am able to navigate them or if I am doomed to fail.
We are a small tutoring business in Northern California that caters to a very small local area (about 3-10 schools). We specialize in math tutoring for students that are struggling. While I am new to this business ( I became an owner about a month ago), the business has been in operation in the area for about 30 years. Covid 19 hit us HARD... The owner closed the physical location and moved to managing a handful of students and teachers resulting in about a 90% decrease in profits and activity. All but a few tutors left and found new opportunities, and we starting hiring new people in early January.
For the sake of brevity I am going to round off a lot of details. It's now my job to get gears moving again, and almost everything is starting over fresh. New employee / client documentation, new internal systems (screen sharing software, emails, scheduling software), and I am learning the pains of payroll for the first time. Now all teachers are currently working remote (we literally have no physical office), and 3-4 of our new teachers are out of state.
My background is in marketing, and I am a newbie to anything related to payroll and taxes (although, I do have a general business degree so I am aware of the basic concepts). Like a doofus, I didn't consider that paying our out-of-state employees would require registering with with those states and learning the different tax rules for them (on top of other headaches).
While researching, I realized that reclassifying our employees as independent contractors would solve a lot of these headaches. I am well aware of the issues (and consequences) related to businesses misclassifying employees as independent contractors. Also, I am not trying to swindle my employees. With everyone working remote now (and most of the staff being brand new), I'm wondering if this classification would be more honest and beneficial to everyone. I feel like for better or worse, what we envision is similar to UBER for teachers. Kind of a side hustle for people that are looking to supplement their income. None of our employees make anything near a living wage and at most clock 10 hours a week through us. I read a number of resources, but I decided to complete the questionnaire here with my partner: https://www.pashalaw.com/reduce-costs-reclassifying-employees-independent-contractors/. We felt that we aligned with answering how they should align.
There are some answers that leave a bit of a gray area, and I think it's these gray areas that make me worried. So here's some bullet points for some of those concerns:

Must workers comply with instructions about when, where, and how they are to work?
- Yes, but only to the extent that it is requested by the students or parents (who usually communicate with the head office, not the tutors directly). Other than that they are allowed to teach using their own preferred methods and set their own schedule (including during days that our business is closed). The teachers are UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES allowed to meet with the students in person, especially in tutor's own homes, in public places, or at the parent's homes.
Does the success of the business depend on the services rendered by the worker or are those services ancillary?
- At this point, yes, but we would like to branch out and make the in-office services about counseling the students, and then aligning them with a tutor as needed. We manage the relationship with the parents, but the parents wouldn't come to us if we could not make a noticeable change in their children's performance at school. This scenario feels a lot like my UBER example, which make me worried that this is the detail and IRS agent would focus on.
Is payment based on some period of time – by the hour, week, or month?
- Yes, they are paid their agreed upon rate multiplied by the time they spend with the student. They are welcome to go long or short depending on their scheduling restrictions and the needs of the students. Paying them a flat rate upfront would be nearly impossible. We pay the tutors twice a month.
Does the employer furnish tools or materials?
- We provide them with an email with our domain extension and access to our screen-sharing tools that we use to record and archive all sessions (for insurance reasons). Beyond that, the tutors are expected to supply their own computer, internet connection, whiteboard, webcam etc...
Does the worker have other clients?
- Absolutely. For last payroll I ran, we had less than 30 hours clocked for every tutor combined. No tutor is making enough to live off. Most of them are either working as full time teachers or have other clients on the side. We obviously don't allow them to steal "our" clients, but we otherwise don't ask about their business. The problem is that we can't guarantee that all of them are set up this way, and if a tutor is in college or something like that, they may not have any other source of income.

I am also aware of the ABC Test in California and would say we mostly align with it: https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/faq_independentcontractor.htm. The second question is a little tricky though:

The worker performs work that is outside the usual course of the hiring entity’s business.

Tutors tutoring is core to the service we are offer our clients. We would be perfectly happy to offer a student counseling without the tutoring, but the odds that counseling alone would help a student improve their grades is extremely unlikely. Grades tend to be the metric that a parent measure's our success by.
Lastly, I am wondering if this change would be more defensible if we hired a part-time employee that was clearly distinct from the others. She would have a set schedule, we would purchase her equipment, have employee review meetings, give her backend access to view client info we don't share with the tutors, etc... We could potentially have her tutor as well, but in a fashion that is set and managed closely by the owners, but this would entirely be a parade to show any auditor that we had a clear distinction.
Sorry for the long message, and I wish I could summarize with a TLDR, but I don't think I can. Thank you in advance for all your help. I look forward to your feedback. :)

Fuck this shit. White Americans are privileged as fuck and don’t know real oppression.

28 [F4F] California - Looking for a Disney BFF

My Eventful COVID Marriage-Based Adjustment of Status ( I-485)/Petition For Alien Relative (I-130) Experience (Los Angeles-Based U.S. Citizen Perspective)

TL;DR Timeline for Los Angeles at the bottom.
My husband (Nigerian) and I (female U.S. Citizen) met in mid-2019 on Tinder (for real, it's not just hookups on there haha), and began dating in Los Angeles, while he was in the US for the 4th time on a Business Visitor Visa (B1). After a whirlwind romance, and basically being inseparable, just the two of us got married at a Chapel (in a mall) in Las Vegas on November 22nd, 2019.
We weren’t aware of the 90 day rule when getting married. Coincidentally, we got married 10 days after my husband’s 90 days since entering the States ended.
We used https://simplecitizen.com/, instead of a lawyer, to file our initial Marriage-Based Adjustment of Status Petition (I-485), Petition For Alien Relative (I-130), Application for Travel Document (I-131), and Application for Employment Authorization (I-765) in Los Angeles, CA on February 3rd, 2020 (we filed on paper, not electronically, and sent it using UPS to receive tracking). Simple Citizen was an inexpensive and very thorough alternative to a traditional filing with a lawyer. They also easily included our information about using a joint sponsor. They had all of our documents quickly prepared and we experienced no requests for information or delays from USCIS.
The Chicago lockbox received our petition on February 5th and we received our receipt numbers via text on February 13th (the physical receipt followed soon after). My husband went in for his biometrics on March 3rd, 2020; a few weeks before the Covid closures began (were also reused for a later biometrics notice that was canceled due to COVID from USCIS). The Case Tracker App updated to “Ready to be Scheduled for an Interview” sometime in April 2020.
My husband was approved for his Employment Authorization Document (EAD I-765)/Advance Parole (AP I-131) Combo Card, 5 months after filing on June 29th and received it on July 22nd. We also moved to another apartment in LA during the petition process and promptly informed them of our new address by filling out form AR-11 online. USCIS confirmed our new address through email about a week later.
Our interview was scheduled for February 3rd, 2021 (informed it was scheduled via Case Tracker on December 24, 2020 and notice received January 4th 2021) at the USCIS Field Office in Los Angeles (300 N Los Angeles St rm 7631, Los Angeles, CA 90012). We woke up bright and early at 4:30 AM and left for the Field Office at 6:00 AM. A few days prior, we chose business casual attire to wear. My husband wore a plaid burgundy button-down shirt, black dress pants, his wedding band, and black dress shoes. I wore a pretty blue and gray floral sleeveless blouse, black dress pants, and black flats. I also wore short, dangly silver earrings, my wedding ring, a silver bracelet, and I brought a black blazer just in case I got cold. I didn’t wear any makeup because I never wear it anyway.
We had a straightforward and enjoyable interview that was scheduled for 7:15 am (one of the first ones of the day). We received the interview notice about a month prior to the scheduled appointment, but I was notified that it was scheduled 42 days before the actual appointment through the case tracker app. I couldn’t see the actual interview date in the app or on the USCIS system. Case Tracker App: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/case-tracker-for-uscis/id921827126
We parked in the garage (221 N Los Angeles St, Los Angeles, CA 90012) across from the Field Office for $17 (cards are accepted). It was early in the day and finding a parking spot was not hard at all. When we left the interview and returned to our car around 8:30 AM the garage was almost completely full, so plan accordingly for parking.
We arrived about 20 or 30 minutes late to the interview office due to the long line to enter USCIS Los Angeles in DTLA. We arrived at 6:40 am in the parking garage and had some trouble finding the correct building because we mistakenly went all around the courthouse looking for USCIS, so that delayed us some. This happened because we foolishly followed behind a different couple and lost track of where they walked. This caused us to go to the courthouse instead. Luckily, we still had our phones, which are allowed as long as they are turned off during the interview, and found our way using google maps.
Once we found the Field Office the line to enter the building from the right was super long and slow-moving (this was the only line we could see at the time). Later, after already waiting in the slow line, we learned that there was another line on the left, if looking directly at the building, which was faster according to a man we thought was an Officer. I later learned that he was just a good samaritan who wanted to help people with early appointments get in on time (he was in the fast line and had been to this Field Office numerous times). We tested this theory by splitting up to see who would get near the front of the line first and periodically speaking on the phone to keep each other updated on our progress. I also called my mom to distract myself from the growing anxiety about being late (which could lead to a canceled interview/denied petition which then could lead to the deportation of my husband or restarting the whole tedious Petition process-as you could see I was getting frantic). Luckily I was able to stay calm.
Soon, my husband called and said he was near the front and I came back to the slow line. As I walked back to join my husband in the other line an Officer in the front of the building also confirmed that the other line was faster (the Officer wanted to know why I was leaving the fast line). The slow line/fast line theory seemed true based on my experience but I went back to join my husband in the slow line because he mistakenly thought he was closer than me. Thankfully, we had absolutely no problems as a result of being late (we both were worried while waiting outside in the line. I was probably more worried though). As you can see the anxiety of being late is no fun. I would recommend you arrive really early to be on the safe side. While going through the metal detectors and having our belongings x-rayed; I asked the Officer what was the fastest way to the USCIS Field Office. He let us know the way and once we got to the office, on the 8th floor, we were called into the interview soon after being checked in.
In the interview room, we were sworn in and then started the interview. The Officer (who was a very kind and chatty Latinx woman) wanted to see our passports and original birth certificates, our certified marriage certificate, my husband's EAD and DMV real ID application, my California driver’s license, and evidence of our relationship. Some of the questions she asked were: how we met, describe our first few dates, when we met each other’s parents, when we got married, questions about our siblings, what my husband does for work, what I do for work, when my husband entered the U.S. and on what visa, and when we moved in together. We were able to answer these questions together or she directed them to my husband. In all, she directed most of the questions at my husband and asked us our respective verification questions (SSN, mailing address, residential address, phone number, our parent’s names, and date of birth). I barely had to say anything the entire interview and all of the questions directed at us were easy as pie. We also brought a photo album and the Officer looked through it.
I definitely over-prepared for the interview with all the documents and evidence (I started prepping as soon as we got the interview notice a month prior). We also brought our joint sponsor’s tax returns and W-2’s from 2018 and 2019, employment letters from 2020 and 2021, and his last 2 month’s pay stubs. The Officer didn’t ask for any of those documents, which made up the bulk of all the things I printed (around 1200 pages). For some of the printing, Staples print services came in handy and I used CVS to print the pictures. The only thing the Officer asked us about our sponsor was how we knew him (he is a friend of my husband; they met through a previous contracting job). I also re-printed our entire Adjustment of Status application, but better to be too prepared than under right? The Officer looked at/kept roughly 100 pages of the stuff I brought.
The Officer kept the evidence of our relationship (bank statements, health insurance, trips, our pandemic puppy’s AKC and ICA registration which showed both of our last names, leases for the 2 apartments we rented in our time together, SoCal Gas and LADWP utility bills for the past 3 months, renters insurance for both apartments, couples therapy bill and video call screenshots, and about 30 photos of us with descriptions and dates on the back of them. We also provided pictures of our 2 apartments. The Officer said she wanted to copy our passports, my husband’s EAD and DMV Real ID application, and my driver’s license. Then she came back with our approval letter!
Overall, the interview was about 15 to 20 minutes. We are so happy and we had a really simple Adjustment of Status process overall! The main issue was delays due to COVID closures but everyone has been dealing with that.
Overall the waiting process has been, coincidentally, exactly a year (we sent in the petition on February 3rd, 2020 and we were approved Feb 3rd, 2021)! My husband sent in his medical exam (I-693) with our original petition in 2020 so that most likely allowed us to be approved during the interview. We are getting the conditional Green Card so we will apply for the 10-year green card (I-751 Petition) 3 months before the 2 year Green Card expires in November 2022.
My advice to you is not to worry (easier said than done, I was worrying basically the entire process). As long as you are in a real, loving marriage everything will be fine. Just be sure to have all the documents, evidence, and original (non-expired) identification (follow the interview notice carefully). Don't be afraid to over-prepare (start preparing as soon as or before you get the interview notice so that you won’t get overwhelmed) and don't try to rehearse your answers, as that may send red flags.
Also, take a ton of pictures of you and your spouse with family, friends, pets, in your home, on trips, and doing activities and print them (you can’t use any digital methods to show the pictures). Be sure to keep the pictures sorted so that you can use them in an album, with dates and descriptions. I got my album from Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B003WSUYOY/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apip_itW1xSYVBpCqo
Wait patiently for the slow process to progress and eventually, the interview notice will appear (make sure you have a secure location to receive the notices. We have a PO Box at UPS). Using https://www.visajourney.com/ was an especially helpful and reliable way to see when you may have petition milestones as everyone updates their timelines depending on the type of petition they are filing Be sure to update your timeline too so that you can help others. In the interview just act natural and look at it like a conversation/sharing the journey of your relationship/marriage with the Officer. I hope this helped to ease your anxiety about this process and I wish you all the best!

TL;DR Timeline for Los Angeles:
Married in Las Vegas: 11/22/19
Sent in Petition via UPS (I-485, I-130, I-131, I-765 and included Medical Exam I-693): 2/3/20
Petition Received at Chicago Lockbox (notified via Case Tracker App): 2/5/20
Receipt Numbers Texted to Us: 2/13/20
Receipt Numbers Received by Mail: 2/20/20
Biometrics Appointment Notice Received by Mail: 2/25/20
Biometrics Appointment (also reused for later biometrics appointment notice that was canceled due to COVID): 3/3/20
Case Tracker Ready to be Scheduled for an Interview: Sometime in April 2020
EAD (I-765)/AP Combo Card (I-131) Approved, notified via Case tracker App: 6/29/20
EAD/AP Combo Card Received: 7/22/20
Case Tracker App Updated to Interview Scheduled: 12/24/20
Interview Date Notice Received: 1/2/21
Interview/Approval of I-485 (approved in the interview, coincidentally, exactly a year later): 2/3/21
Conditional Green Card Received: 2/10/21

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California health officials lifted COVID-19 stay-at-home orders across Southern California, the Bay Area and the San Joaquin Valley on Monday. As a result, all of the state's 58 counties will California has become one of the first states in the country to have emergency workplace rules to protect employees from COVID-19 exposure. During a major outbreak, defined as 20 or more cases A pop-up Covid-19 testing site in Los Angeles, California on 29 October 2020. Photograph: Frederic J Brown/AFP/Getty Images “They’re clearly targeting people having parties,” Mathis said. Elections are an essential activity, and applicable provisions of the Elections Code continue to govern elections during COVID-19 unless suspended or amended. Specific legislation has been enacted to address the administration of elections during COVID-19. Pursuant to this legislation, measures like vote by mail, early voting locations, and ballot drop boxes have been used to ensure that California’s elections are safe, secure, and accessible. Find As California Loosens COVID-19 Rules, Experts Say Public Must Take Precautions To Prevent Another Spike In Cases Sammy Caiola Monday, January 25, 2021 | Sacramento, CA Listen / Update Required To The new rules took effect overnight for Southern California and a large swath of the Central Valley, triggered after more than 85% of beds in intensive care units were occupied in those regions. Official website for California Coronavirus (COVID-19) Response daily updates and resources. Stay home - save lives. Find information and services to help you and help others. California’s Division of Occupational Health and Safety, known as Cal/OSHA, adopted an emergency set of COVID-19 standards in November. Assembly Bill 685, which takes effect Jan. 1, toughens rules... For employees who are excluded from the workplace due to a workplace COVID-19 exposure, the regulations state that an employee’s salary, seniority and benefits must be maintained. Additionally,... Forms & Rules > Rules of Court > Emergency Rules Related to COVID-19 Emergency Rules Related to COVID-19. Topics Rules of Court; New & Amended Rules; Local Rules; Emergency Rules Related to COVID-19; Print. Current as

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California orders residents to stay home to halt coronavirus

Governor Gavin Newsom will be in Napa, Calif. to give an update on COVID-19 in California and the state's progress on reopening. Our Community Guidelines and policies apply to all YouTube content and define what you can and cannot do on YouTube. Watch live coverage as California Gov. Newsom provides a briefing on the state’s response to the Covid-19 pandemic.» ... Watch live coverage as California Gov. Newsom provides a briefing on the ... California's 40 million residents should stay home indefinitely and venture outside only for essential jobs, errands and some exercise, Gov. Gavin Newsom say... Update: California Gov. Gavin Newsom relaxed county reopening criteria on May 18, a move he said will allow most of the state’s 58 counties to begin allowing... WASHINGTON – A divided Supreme Court late Friday blocked enforcement of California's prohibition on indoor church services during the coronavirus pandemic, t... California restaurants can soon reopen in counties that meet standards for testing and success at reducing cases of the coronavirus, while strip malls can so... Gov. Gavin Newsom says California is moving many of its counties to a more restrictive tier in its COVID-19 reopening system as the state sees a significant ... The truth about the race to a coronavirus vaccineMask vs No Mask Lab Results - Do they work? https://youtu.be/qDeP7-rUZmoJOIN OUR NEW EMAIL LIST: https://mai... You thought Elf on the Shelf was creepy? That elf doesn't have anything on Tyrant King Gavin.--Click the subscribe button above to make sure you don't miss a...

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California orders residents to stay home to halt coronavirus